I Shall Believe
by PinkTribeChick
Summary: Lex and Amber find comfort and more in each other one late night . . .


**Title: I Shall Believe**

**Fandom: **The Tribe

**Author: **PinkTribeChick

**Summary:** Lex and Amber find comfort and more in each other one late night . . .

**Extended Summary: **This is an alternate universe Series 5 story, where Bray has been found and has died, and Lex and Amber find romance where they least expect it.

**Rating: **Teen

**Pairing: **Lex-Amber

**Author's Notes: **This is another story inspired by a song, and frankly, what I feel like is one of my better pieces. There is a mild sexual situation, but nothing too bad. I hope you guys enjoy it!

**Disclaimer:** All characters, situations, and song lyrics remain the property of their respective owners. Any original characters are sole property of me, PinkTribeChick.

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**I Shall Believe**

_"Come to me now . . . lay your hands over me . . . even if it's a lie . . . say it will be alright . . . and I shall believe . . . but I do believe . . . that not everything is gonna be the way . . . you think it ought to be . . . it seems like every time I try to make it right . . . it all comes down on me . . . please say honestly you won't give up on me . . . and I shall believe . . ."_

_Sheryl Crow

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Lex awoke in the middle of the night to the faint sound of sobbing coming from nearby. He sat up, rubbing his eyes sleepily. Then he looked around the room. There was no one there but him. Siva was out on patrol with some of her militia, keeping the newfound peace of the city. No, the crying was coming from elsewhere.

He kicked the covers off, standing up. Quickly pulling on a pair of loose sweat pants, he moved the doorway of his room. He peered down both sides of the hallway, his eyes and ears attempting to locate the source of the sound. It didn't take very long for him to find it.

A flickering light shone out into the hallway from the room next door to his. Amber's room. Music played softly amidst the sobs, as though it were there only to dampen the sound. Lex's footsteps were gentle as he made his way from his doorway to hers.

He stood there for a while, unsure of what to say. He just watched her, her blonde hair, which usually framed her face in straight, longish layers, a tangled mass. She was curled up against the pillows on the bed, the blankets pulled up around her, facing him with her eyes closed, weeping softly. She had a picture clutched tightly to her chest.

There was no point in asking her why she was crying. He knew the answer already.

Almost four months had passed since Bray had died. They'd found him in one of the first Techno work camps that was liberated. He was half-starved, with badly infected wounds on his back from a lashing he'd received for trying to protect a hungry little girl who'd stolen food. Delirious with fever, he'd barely recognized Amber and Pride when they stumbled upon him in one of the holding cages.

Amber sat by his side for three days, nonstop, hoping he'd wake up and get better. But having received no proper medical attention in the camp for his wounds, they'd become gangrenous, and there was little Patch could do to help beyond making Bray a little more comfortable as he lay there dying. Rescue had come too late for Bray. Amber held his hand as he had taken his last few breaths. And just as quietly as he'd come into the lives of the Mall Rats, he was gone.

Bray's passing had left a permanent mark on the tribe. It was a symbol that there was no going back. Their world was never going to return to normal. But no one felt his death more harshly than Amber. She had lost the person she loved most in the world and was subsequently left to raise their son on her own. The others helped, even Ebony, but it wasn't the same as having Bray there. He'd never even gotten to meet his son. And it wasn't enough that Amber had to live with memories of him inside of her for the rest of her life - she had a little boy that looked just like him, and in looking at him, she was reminded every single second of the love that she had lost.

Slowly, things had returned to somewhat normal. Each of the Mall Rats was moving on with life as best they knew how. But not Amber. For her, life had come to a screeching halt. The only thing that kept her going was little Bray.

Lex smiled sympathetically at her. He knew just how she felt. It was the same empty, hopeless feeling he'd felt when Zandra and the baby had died. And again when Tai-San disappeared. And even though Tai-San was back now, things just weren't the same. Lex was with Siva, and Tai-San was in love with Mega. She didn't even live in the mall anymore. Oddly enough, Lex didn't really mind too much. He'd already grieved and trudged on, as he always did. He'd dealt with so much loss in his lifetime, it almost seemed like nothing to him.

Amber's sobs grew louder as a new song came on the boombox across the room. Creeping past her sleeping son and his crib, Lex moved toward Amber. He accidentally kicked one of little Bray's toys that lay on the floor, making a loud jingling noise. It broke the dense silence, startling Amber. Lex silently cursed himself for not paying attention. Amber sat up, pulling the blankets up around her in an attempt to hide her body, which was scantily clad with a spaghetti-strap peach nightgown.

"Did I wake you?" she asked hoarsely, hanging her head in embarrassment.

"Sort of . . . I wasn't sleeping too well anyway," he answered. He stepped forward a few paces. "Are you alright?" Amber pulled the covers up tighter around herself, a tense look washing over her face, as though she was trying to put on a brave front. Lex felt an indefinable ache cross over him as he looked at her beautiful face and eyes, wet with tears.

"I'm fine," she said defensively, wiping her eyes. She forced a smile. "You can go back to bed, Lex." She layed back down, yanking the blankets up over her head. Lex finally walked over and sat down on the edge of the bed. He turned the knob on the oil lamp that was sitting on the table at the end of her bed, shortening the wick and dimming the light in the room, in hopes it would help her to drift off to sleep. He thought carefully before speaking.

"Look . . . I know what you're feeling. What you're having to deal with. I don't blame you for crying your eyes out. I've done the same myself once or twice," he said quietly. "I still have to deal with the pain every single day. But as time goes by, you learn to deal with it. It subsides. It does get easier." He sat silently for a few moments before she spoke.

"I don't think it will," came the muffled response. "I've lost the love of my life, my soulmate. There is no one . . . nothing . . . left in my life. I wish I had just died with Bray. It would have been a welcome alternative to this . . . this aching." Lex sighed, rubbing his temples.

"And where would that leave little Bray? He needs you, Amber. It's bad enough that he's missing his father. He doesn't need to lose you as well. You need to stop thinking of how badly you feel and start thinking of him. And as much as I hate to say it . . . we all need you," he retorted. "We all love you . . . even me. You know that. And while it may seem like . . . right now . . . that the world is ending or the sky is falling or whatever . . . just know that . . . things will get better. You were left behind for a reason. So . . . don't give up on life just yet, okay? 'Cause you're not alone." With that, he stood up, walking to the door.

Amber started to sob again. That was probably the nicest thing Lex had ever said to her. And the truest thing she'd ever heard in her life. She pushed the covers off, getting out of bed. She padded over to Lex. He turned to look at her. She was crying harder than before, her arms crossed over her chest, her head hung low.

"I just feel so hollow . . . and frozen. I miss him so much, Lex," she whispered. Lex reached out and pulled her to him, wrapping his arms around her as she buried her head in his chest. Her tears were hot against his bare skin, making the ache he felt inside worse. He hated seeing her upset. He always had. He just wanted to wrap her up in a safe cocoon and take all her hurt away.

"I know. But . . . it'll be alright. I promise," he whispered. "Shhh . . ." He kissed the top of her head. "It'll be alright. You've just got to stop focusing on Bray so much and focus on you and the baby. The rest will come with time."

"I just don't understand . . . why was he taken from us? Why so soon? I always thought we'd grow old together . . . have lots of kids . . . and grand kids . . . that we would do everything together. I never expected this. I never even saw it coming. Even when he was missing, I just kept hoping . . . believing . . . that he was alive somewhere. And that we'd be together again some day. Forever. But now . . ." Her voice broke.

"Now you're not sure of anything anymore?" Lex offered. "You're not sure of who you are, of where you belong, of why you're here. How you're going to keep going without him, without the love you guys had. And you're wondering if you'll ever fall in love again. If true love is possible twice in a lifetime . . ." He rubbed her back soothingly, as she calmed down, his heart feeling like it was going to beat out of his chest. This was certainly an unfamiliar emotion, feeling this strongly, caring this much about another human being. With Zandra and Tai-San, it had always been more or less about sex, about hunger. What he was feeling now was totally beyond that. It was love. This was what love really felt like.

"Yeah," Amber agreed, looking up at Lex. "I'm wondering if there's someone else out there for me. Or if Bray was even _'the one'_ to begin with."

As she stared at Lex, strange new sensations flooded her. She noticed Lex still had his arms around her waist, holding her protectively. How soft his skin felt against hers. How amazing the things he was saying made her feel. How amazing _he_ made her feel. And in thinking that, it wasn't entirely a new feeling. She'd always felt somewhat attracted to him. But this was a little different. There was something in the way that he was looking at her, the way it made her feel. It wasn't really attraction, or even sex, so to speak, though that played into it. It was something akin to how she felt for Bray, but much stronger, much deeper. And as she looked Lex in the eye, she could see he was feeling it, too.

"Amber . . . ," Lex managed hoarsely. "I . . ." She smiled.

"I know," she whispered, letting him know she felt the same way. Closing her eyes, she leaned up on tiptoe and kissed him ever-so-gently on the lips. It was like . . . magic.

They kissed slowly, her hand running up his neck to wrap her fingers through his hair as he pulled her tighter to him. As their kisses became more frenzied, Lex kicked the door shut, locking it with one hand. They backed away, toward the bed. Lex slid one of the straps of her nightgown off her shoulder, kissing her shoulder tenderly. Gently, he picked her up and layed her down on the bed as they continued to kiss . . .

A few hours later, Lex woke up beside her, curled up underneath the blankets. The lamp had almost died down completely. In the remaining light that flickered about the room, he watched her as she slept peacefully, running a finger softly up and down her spine, against her bare skin. He nuzzled her cheek, and she curled up against him as he wrapped his arms around her again.

"I love you," she said with a sleepy smile, laying her head against his chest and drifting back to sleep.

"I love you, too," he whispered as he floated off to sleep as well, completely content for the first time in his life . . .

**The End**

_**(for now atleast . . .)

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_**Please review – I love hearing from my readers! Thanks for reading!**_


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